Chasing My Thirties Entry #3

Wednesday March 19th 2025

So my ecommerce journey has been interesting and I'm actually having fun connecting the dots. The only problem I have right now that's preventing me from going live, is that the transaction details that show up on your bank statements is showing my entire home address, and while most of you already know my address, I'd prefer it wasn't on full display for everyone to see. So I'm working with customer service on getting this corrected. It's frustrating but I'm sure it'll be handled soon. In the meantime, I've got my label printer and shipping supplies all ready to go :)

In other news, I had my pre op appointment for my hysterectomy today and we are still a go for my surgery next Tuesday! I will be honest, while this is my third surgery in nine months, this is the first major surgery I've ever had so I'm a bit anxious. Going under makes me very nervous but it's the recovery that worries me more. Today I discussed with my doctor that he'll be removing my uterus, cervix, fallopian tubes, and my right ovary.

I had the last period I will ever have in my lifetime and after nineteen years of it, I'm so glad to be done with it. Even talking about my period right now grosses me out and I can't believe I'm publicly talking about it either.

I remember the day it started like it was yesterday. I was wearing white pajamas with milkshakes, French fries, and burgers printed on them; they were my favorite. I was getting ready for school when I first noticed it getting ready for school; it was the morning of one of my sixth grade final exams to be exact. I was a super early bloomer, I was ten when mine started and it's slowly destroyed me ever since. I'm the kind of girl that's embarrassed, grossed out, and ashamed of my period so imagine having to grow up and suffer through middle school and high school like that. It was not very fun and even into adult hood it sucked. When I first moved in with Tim I was so worried about it, but he didn't care because he grew up with two sisters. I still cared but it got easier over time.

Speaking of lasts, granted I'll still have my left ovary so I'll still ovulate, I am so fucking ready to get rid of my right one. My right one has caused me so much pain over the years, and more recently these past seventeen months, that it's literally going to improve the quality of my life having it removed. I'm currently ovulating right now and while most women enjoy that time, it's fucking agony for me. I don't know what changed in January, but damn has it been a tough two months dealing with this pain daily, and with me ovulating it's only making it worse. I'm so bloated I can barely fit in any of my clothes and I've noticed that when ovulation is peaking, if I eat it makes the bloating and cramping so much worse, so my eating habits have been kind of messy lately. Sometimes it's even hard to walk, sit down, stand up, climb stairs, bend over; honestly no matter which way I go it seems to hurt.

You're probably wondering why I'm talking about all this and well if you've known me since 2012, I've always been open about my health journey. Mostly to help spread awareness and because the more I talk about it, the more likely I am to get better. I've never been shy with sharing my health battles and I've learned a lot along the way by sharing my story and connecting with ours in a similar situation. I guess I also want to help shed some light on women's health because it's really not easy to find a doctor that listens to your concerns AND who genuinely cares enough to help you. I saw the same gyno for about six or seven years and it got me nowhere but with my new one, he helped me out from the very first visit and now here I am getting surgery so I can finally be released from the pain and misery my reproductive organs have caused me for almost two decades. To be clear, my previous gyno was a great guy and was very helpful during any times of need, but as far as the actual root issues I was having, he didn't really help in that department.

Anyway.

I'm really looking forward to getting through this surgery and the four-eight weeks of recovery I have ahead of me so I can finally start experiencing more of life pain free. I still have all of my other issues of course, but once this is handled I'll be able to focus on those and get back to taking care of myself again.

Ugh I can't wait until my period and ovaries are no longer controlling my life. I can't tell you how many birthdays, holidays, time off from work, vacations, events, weekends and trips that were negatively affected by my fucking period or me ovulating.

I'm just so ready to move forward and I find it extremely symbolic that this is happening before I turn thirty. I already know my thirties will be better than my twenties, I've done a lot of growing up these past few years and I think I've done a pretty good job at building my career along with building a wealth of knowledge that I'll only be able to take to a higher level in my thirties. I hate to keep referring to the mortgage industry, but it truly has helped shape me into the person I am today and I'm grateful for every experience... even the one's that almost destroyed me. To this day there are still some names I don't want to hear because it reminds of a tricky loan I worked on lol.

Anyway. By this time next week I'll be nearly thirty-six hours post op. I can't believe I'm having a hysterectomy at twenty-nine. I'm truly blessed to have health insurance and to have a doctor that is willing to help me. I'm blessed to have been able to afford this because while health insurance helps, it also really kind of doesn't when you have to come up with four figures just to be able to have the surgery, while still expecting a bill after all is said and done. But I'll save my health insurance rant for later because I'm over this day.

-A